So here are my reasons... and they are legit.
- I ... I am a weirdo. I say weird things and I do weird things that most people only do if they think that no one is around. Like I rap while I do my dishes, even though it is completely awful and it annoys everyone around me because I am basically shouting my rap. It goes something like this... "My name is Kara... I'm here to say... that I do dishes... every day. I don't like plates... I don't like spoons... I do like trays....................................... (this is where I can't think of anything that rhymes with spoons, so I finish it off with) I don't do drugs, SO CHECK ME OUT."
- I am very very very loud. I grew up in a family with four brothers, so if I needed something, I freaking had to shout it. Everyone is always telling me, "Kara.... tone it down. Tone. It. Down." But I can't, dear readers, I just can't. I like talking at an outrageously high level. And so when I meet a guy and I scream, "Hi my name is Kara and I don't do drugs!!!!!" They just kind of look at me funny and back away slowly...
- While on the subject of speaking, I just adapted a new speaking method that can only harm me in my pursuit of the opposite sex. I started speaking like a man. Whenever I want to emphasize something important, I say it in my lowest voice possible. "But seriously.... it was scary...." (said like a 75 year old man) Sigh... I don't think guys find it attractive when your voice pitch matches that of their best friends.
- I have kind of given up on my appearance... I used to spend at least an hour a day getting ready for school/work. But now, now that I am working at a campsite, all I do is literally roll out of bed, brush my teeth, and put a flower in my hair. My hair is in a pony almost all of the time, and I don't really wear much makeup anymore. So now my mediocre looks only increase my struggle to find guys.
- I am not that sporty. I don't mind playing sports, but I am oh-so awful at them. I can barely dribble at basketball, I end up hitting my face every time I play volleyball, I can barely swim,.... and I have no coordination. Seriously... today I was walking happily along in the kitchen to go get the mop bucket when WAM!!! I nearly trip to my death on the tile. I quickly turn around to see what giant object was placed in the middle of the tile floor that so nearly killed me, and all I see is ... tile. I tripped over nothing!!! How is that even possible???
- Along with the no coordination thing, I can not dance. Oh, I try to dance, thinking that if I make a happy face then all my jerky dance moves I execute are ok. But no... I look like I am having a seizure on the dance floor... and sometimes, when I try to look sexy on the dance floor so I can lure in a sexy man-beast, I end up pulling a butt muscle and then just kind of twitch for the rest of the night.
- I seem to just be a friend for all guys... don't get me wrong, I don't really have a problem with this. Its just that sometimes, I want to be more than friends, and ....... ok this point bores me so I am moving on...... WHAT?? It's my blog, and I can leave a point uncompleted if I so very choose.
- I. Am. A. Coward. I can't flirt to guys that I actually like. I can't go through with dates or lean in to kiss someone. I can't ever make the first move... so I end up waiting for the guy to make the first move but he never does because he doesn't want to make the first move on a girl who talks like a man and raps all the time and who never even tries to make herself look pretty. So I just stand around, hoping that the guy will ask me, and he never does, and I never ask him because I am coward. I never get anywhere... ak.
Ok, I know 8 reasons doesn't sound like a lot, but these are seriously 8 BIG reasons... each reason in of itself is like 50 little reasons... so I basically just wrote 400 reasons why guys don't like me. Last time I did the math, that is a lot of reasons. But its ok you guys... I will probably just become a spinster who doesn't own a house full of cats because I am allergic... instead I will collect fish... lots of little fish who will love me and I them. And I will eat jerky and muffins all day every day until I am pleasantly plump and I will wear yellow everyday even though it clashes with my skin tone. And my little fishies will adore me as I rap to them about how I don't do drugs. And I will be content.